Truly, some have been victims… of crime, abuse, injustice, degradation and circumstance. But many of us choose the mindset of a victim… when really we have no right to. It is a choice we have made… because we can. But in the same way that we can make that choice to be a victim,we can also choose to not be a victim and take control.
The victim mindset is utterly useless. It disempowers us and puts us in a position of inability. Inability to actually solve the issue we are dealing with and move forward in life. The Victim Mindset blames others, refuses to take ownership or responsibility and leaves the ‘victim’ with a perpetual chip on their shoulder. Sometimes people get so used to having a victim mentalitythat the very thought of life being better, actually makes them nervous. In reality, for some, its ‘better the devil you know’.
Whether it’s the X Box playing, 30 year old adult child, living at home with mum and dad, the drug addict who feels entitled to take advantage of the welfare system, or the misery guts who quite simply… has got too used to being miserable, the victim mindset is a psychological cancer that needs to be removed. It will keep you in a holding pattern of emotional paralysis.
If you can identify any of the symptoms of this mindset in your life, do yourself a favour and declare war on it.
- Take responsibility for your thoughts, feelings and actions (you have more control over these than you think)
- Let go of worrying about what you can’t control (which is pretty much everything except what’s written above)
- If you’re struggling to do the above, talk to a counsellor
- Be intentional, purposeful, proactive
- Stop blaming others
- Develop a culture of appreciation and gratitude in your life
Nick offers clinical supervision and counselling in the Perth CBD, Rockingham and Online. He is an exceptionally skilled and compassionate counsellor and psychotherapist with over 20 years’ professional experience. He is also an active member of the Australian Counselling Association. Nick has a substantial background in both private practice and the community health and education sectors. He specialises in supporting young people, individual adults, couples and families. Nick particularly enjoys relationship and marriage counselling, assisting couples overcome relationship barriers to gain greater intimacy.